Time’s up!

Well, I am now 10 days overdue and tomorrow time is up: I am going to be induced.

As I already said, I started having some contractions during the evening on Tuesday – which was 40+5, which amounted to nothing. I had the same the day afterwards, and again they died off when I went to bed.

Then on Thursday, at 7 days over, I went to see the consultant and had a sweep. (Ouch). She said I was 1cm dilated, cervix is 1cm thick but soft. When I first had it taken, my blood pressure was a little high – 140/95 compared with 110/75 at my last midwife appointment. But they took it a few times and it came down to 130something/82, so they said that was ok. They kept suggesting I was feeling “stressed” because of being in hospital – I wasn’t – in fact, I was quite enjoying it in the fancy antenatal day unit with the ultra comfy pregnant lady chairs!

Anyway, the day of the sweep both T and I really thought that would be it. I’d had two nights of contractions and hopefully the sweep would just push things a little bit over the edge. No such luck. That night I had the occasional twinge, and felt pretty uncomfortable after the rummaging around down there, but I had nothing that could be described as contractions. Soul destroying!

The next night though, the false contractions were back – and the night after that too. But everytime I went to bed, they stopped.

Yesterday (9 days over) I had a show and got my hopes up again. But despite a few pathetically mild contractions it was pretty obvious I wasn’t about to go into labour anytime soon. It felt like the Last Chance Saloon for me, and I was pretty depressed about it. When I woke up this morning with no pains, I resigned myself to the idea of being induced and have just been focusing on that all day today.

I’ve been a bit emotional, thinking about Lilly and how her life is just about to change and she can’t really comprehend how. I had a conversation with her this morning about how tomorrow mummy and daddy are going to the hospital to get the new baby sister, and she is going to stay with her Nanna. I was telling her about when she was born in the hospital, and she said “I’m your baby, aren’t I mummy?”

It still feels so strange that we are going to have two children soon – and a newborn baby to look after alongside a toddler! Are we crazy!!! How are we going to manage?!?!

And because of the induction – which is going to involve having my waters broken to start things off – I know that there is an even greater likelihood that this might end in an emergency c-section again. But hopefully if things look like they are headed that way (e.g. if heartrate is dipping and I’m not making good progress) that decision will be made earlier, meaning that at the very least, I will be able to be awake and T can be present when the procedure is done (last time was under general anaesthetic).

I really want my VBAC but my baby is the most important thing. I can’t go on being pregnant, I feel physically exhausted and uncomfortable all the time. If I get my natural birth – amazing!! I’ll be over the moon! But this time, having gained a better understanding of why what happened last time happened, I hope I’ll be much better able to understand and come to terms with the delivery, however it happens.

Wish me luck!

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24 week midwife appointment

I’ve just come back from my 24 week midwife appointment at the GPs. Saw a lovely midwife who I haven’t met before, and despite forgetting my notes and having to dash home for them (typical me), all was fine!

I told her about a dizzy spell I had a week ago – i came over all light headed and really dizzy and had to lay down for about two hours before it passed. She said it could be a dip in blood pressure but today mine was fine. The urine sample was all clear too, and she said my growth is spot on for 24 weeks. Best of all, she listened for the heartbeat… wow, that’s the first time i’ve heard it. Poor Tony missed it as he was at work, but he will get to hear it at the 4d scan in a couple of weeks. You could tell the baby was moving around as the sound kept getting louder and fainter as she moved nearer and further away. It was 148 beats per minute – which the midwife said is comfortably in the normal range of 110 – 160.

I also asked her about my scarring (from my operation two years ago – it runs right down my tummy and is very deep). She said that scar tissue is less flexible than normal skin, so although it is ok and the growth is right for the time being, it may be that it will become very tight because the scar tissue won’t expand like skin would. In that case, it could be that they induce me a bit earlier, if it is becoming a problem. But there is every chance it will be fine. So, i’m happy with that.

She also filled in my Mat B1 form – she put on it 20th December as my due date, even though she noticed in my notes it says 22nd December… not sure why that should be, as that wasn’t the date according to my LMP, or my dating scan. Anyway, I persuaded her I don’t want it any nearer to Christmas than it already is!!

Tomorrow I will be taking my Mat B1 form to work and telling them my news… nerve wracking. But once that is done, hopefully i will be able to sleep better at night without worrying about what the reaction will be like. Having said that, I find myself turning lots of things over in my mind at night – about how i’ll look after the baby, will i be able to breastfeed ok, how many clothes should i buy etc etc. I suppose it’s all part of becoming a mum… worrying must be part of the territory!

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Nine weeks gone already!

Well, it’s nine weeks today (by my calculations, nine weeks three by the doc’s). Things are still going along fine, we went to a booking in appointment with a midwife called Lynn at the hospital yesterday. She took blood tests, blood pressure, checked urine and gave us a whole load of reading material. We also got our Bounty pack of baby related goodies!

She advised us on the nuchal scan, which apparently you can’t get on the NHS. You can have it done at Liverpool hospital for £110, and it has to be done before 13 weeks. They do offer you the blood test at 16 weeks, but apparently, the nuchal translucency scan is more accurate. T and I have been deliberating for a while about whether to give into curiosity and pay for a scan before the nhs one at 13 weeks. We had decided that perhaps it was a bit pricey when all we had to do was wait another couple of weeks, but now that we have been told about this nuchal scan, i think it has given us an excuse to go for it. I’m going to ring them today to book one in, so hopefully that’ll be fairly soon.

Had a bit of a wobbler last week stressing out about not really having any symptoms. I didn’t think i felt queasy enough, or tired enough. But my nerves have settled a bit, as i’m now aware that i’m yawning more, and that i do feel queasy a lot of the time, just not very severely. Having said that, yesterday morning for about half an hour i really thought i would be sick, although after a second breakfast it passed thank goodness!

Still haven’t told anyone at work, although i had a dream last night that i did. I went out for lunch on Saturday with some of the girls from work, including one who had her one and a half year old daughter with her. She was absolutely adorable and made me even more excited at the prospect of being a mummy!

Time does seem to be going fairly slowly at the moment though. I was excited about reaching seven weeks, it felt like loads. Now i’m at nine I feel like it’s taking ages and can’t wait to be 13 weeks so we can have the first proper scan and then tell everyone.

I’m trying to concentrate on thoughts of our holiday in the Algarve in just under three weeks… i cannot wait!!

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